Just writing a quick post in the middle of my madness of projects and CTRL+Zing my way into insanity really. I have a quite a bit to shave off my back—omg, that’s a horrific visual. I meant figuratively… I don’t have a hairy back! D’X
Let’s start over! We’re about to get into the mind of a struggling artist and we’re all not alone in this process.
After my currently listed and pending/unlisted galleries, I’ll be taking an indefinite break from group shows for a bit, unless a theme I really feel inspired to do comes up (I’m kinda waiting for an anime theme ironically hahahah O-O’ DRAGONBALL Z PLEASE).
My portfolio will stay updated with work that is unrelated to said change. I don’t want to show any overlap. I would rather change everything entirely when I’m ready, whenever that will be. And, no, I’m not going anime lol. It’s fun and all, but I think I’ve proven time and again that I’m pretty horrible at it. Haha!
I will keep doing commissions, selectively, but may close them from time to time. I always enjoyed creating sentiment for people. Next to seeing my own imagination come to life, drawing for others in that way does make me happy about what I do.
For a decent amount of time, I’ve been needing this ‘evolution’ of myself and how I go about creating. I’ve grown exhausted of the unnecessary art blocks. Things are and were becoming stagnant and this is something I must go through ‘alone’ unfortunately. There are other things I want to turn my attention to that I believe to have been neglecting and it’s going to take a lot of my time—many months most likely—and lots of energy to do.
I found this quote floating around on the internet and it personally hit home for me:
Fear stifles our thinking and actions. It creates indecisiveness that results in stagnation. I have known talented people who procrastinate indefinitely rather than risk failure. Lost opportunities cause erosion of confidence, and the downward spiral begins. – Charles Stanley
It’s the epitome of who I am as much as I hate to admit it. Making pretty pictures for a living has literally been the bane of certain aspects of my life and instead of jumping off the fence and making a choice between two things, I stayed up on it, like a scared cat. The extent of how much I could have improved on anything was stymied. I will rightfully admit that I could be better than where I am today. But what’s done is done.
Enough with the past as I want to be in the here-and-now and move on from what I was trying so hard to resuscitate. Everyone needs something new every once in a while and I think I’m overdue for a new me.